Harvard Professor and Author Allison Wood Brooks Visits Campus

COURTESY OF DEERFIELD COMMUNICATIONS

During all-school meeting on September 24, O’Brien Associate Professor of Business Administration at Harvard Business School Alison Wood Brooks introduced her book Talk: The Science of Conversation and The Art of Being Ourselves, where she covered the hidden architecture of conversation and the tips for improving conversation. Brooks argued the structure of everyday conversations and how even the smallest improvements in interaction can impact relationships between individuals. She encourages the act of conversation despite it being both difficult, enjoyable, and complex due to the opportunities offered to feel connected, loved, and heard.

Brooks provided a clip of The Batchelor–an Australian reality dating competition series–as an example of an unsuccessful conversation. Although the man was trying to maintain the conversation by asking questions constantly, the woman solely responded to those questions without asking follow-up questions, focusing on her own goals of the conversation. Brooks specified that one should consider what the other person is trying to accomplish in a conversation, not their own goals, alluding to the significance of selflessness. Most importantly, she stressed the importance of constantly practicing conversation skills in any environment.

English Teacher Andy Stallings talked about his experience eating breakfast with Brooks and his senior English class, Think Slow: Contemporary Reading. In the dining hall, Mr. Stallings said that Brooks taught the students how to effectively “negotiate, ask questions, and share information,” as she learned more about the students in general. At one point, she gave them an exercise of asking endless follow-up questions.

Mr. Stallings also saw the points in Brooks’s presentation being brought up across campus. “At lunch, the table I went to almost immediately jumped into the points [Brooks] had been talking about, and how they will be enacting them in classrooms and anywhere else,” he said.

Outside the classroom and without faculty guidance, students were implementing her teachings right after School Meeting. Although students expressed frustration towards the cell phone policy in the beginning weeks, Brooks emphasized the importance of face-to-face interactions, advocating for these types of exchanges over virtual conversations.

The Freshmen and Sophomore class, who are the primary groups the cell-phone policy is applied to, expressed gratitude towards their phone-free hours after Brooks’s presentation. Henry Fuller ’28 stated, “Alison Wood Brooks effectively told [students] how to communicate, and communication is one of the most fundamental aspects of life.”

Fuller further added that the art of conversation is applicable to most life experiences. “Communication builds a true life skill that the cell phone policy fosters, and Brooks highlighted the fact that communication helps us become more socially developed and prepared for the outside world. You need it when applying to jobs; you need it when making friends; you need it in every sort of situation,” he said.

Alison Wood Brooks’ emphasis on the art of conversation and the importance of face-to-face communication decreased technology usage across the student body as well. “She’s encouraging us to limit the use of technology because she’s saying that there’s more value in face-to face communication than behind a screen,” Charmaine Ma ’29 commented. “I think that I’ve been using my phone less because of the phone ban, but also because of what Alison Wood Brooks said about communication.”

In addition to the connection between the cell-phone policy and the student body’s experiences after Brooks’s presentation, Deerfield faculty were also informed of the significance of face-to-face conversation. From the Student Life Office, Associate Head of School Life Amie Creagh stated, “The world underwent a time of disconnectedness over the pandemic, where we might have turned to a reliance on virtual communication. There is probably a deficiency to account in all of us because there were years that we were simply not practicing to communicate with others.”

Ms. Creagh argued that the pandemic halted the social growth in the majority of students, forcing them to rely on social media to communicate. The cell-phony policy is the immediate response to combatting reliance on social media–a problem that remains prevalent to this day. “The pandemic pulled us away from conversation, making social media the great connector, but this cannot be a substitute for in-person conversation. And I think Alison Brooks showed us how to do that.”

Ms. Creagh added, “When I was in high school, not being good at something made me avoid it. So, if there’s anyone else whose high school experience might be characterized by that, I hope they can reach out to me for a conversation.” This way, Ms. Creagh can guide the student to a possible plan, as she “[has] information that makes [her] feel confident that [she] can be a good conversationalist.”

Ultimately, Brooks instructed that the goal of conversation is to construct a “culture of connection,” whether with or without cell phones. She taught students how to form relationships, answer tough questions, and talk to one another. The new cell-phone policy has been a big adjustment for many, but gave students more opportunities to connect, share, and Talk.